update

SO I regret to inform you that this blogs seems like a failure. i have found myself censoring my comments as i go, working to make sure that non of this comes back to bite me later. i'm so afraid that my true feelings might get traced back to me.

that's sad. i know. but that's my life, lived under a blanket, hidden away.

i did make step forward the other day. the boyfriend of one of my friends tore me a new one for leaving a comment on her page that was a tad colorful. not, i'm not a guy that could be called "forward". i'm as straight an arrow as anyone has ever been. my inner thoughts are my own, but I never, ever act inappropriately. if i ever say anything in jest, it's with a wink and a laugh and everyone know i'm teasing. but the internet bit me. with no nonverbal ques, i was misunderstood...at least by this one jerk. i haven't heard from the girl yet. i apologised immediately, but it gets my goat that this knucklehead had the nerve to cal me, me of all people, on my barely suggestive comment.

self righteous bastard.


anyway, i've been staring into the vasty deep again. thinking about space, and time, and the pointlessness of it all. i came up with what seemed like a poem. i liked it. it really felt like it expressed my exquisite anguish. i haven't got it on hand, but i'll try to remember to post it.



in happier news, i graduated! finally an end to pointless papers and retarded teachers and insane exams. now i'm confronted with "what to do next", a question i've heard nonstop.

the answer is i don't know. there are a million things that need doing. i need to get feedback from my folks about what they are expecting. but for now i'm just thrilled to CHILL for a while.

i watched 2 movies this morning and it rocked to waste the time. stomp the yard (dull) and hell boy (not half bad).

I plan to do more of this soon.

ttfn folks.
god help me.