fear

i've been going through some old paper lately and i found a note from december 2007 that says this...

the unknown is the only fear. once the unknown is happening fear becomes pain, discomfort, etc.

i think this is really a breakthrough idea. i'm constantly thinking about what could happen, what could go wrong, what i'm forgetting, or what seems like a hard obstacle.

people have always said to me that the worst case never happens, but that argument is flawed. just because the worst case rarely happens doesn't mean it can't. but it's a new thought that what i fear most isn't the pain of a fall, or the humiliation of failure...what i fear most is the uncertainty of trying.

ps. another reason i think i'm abnormal, i've been keeping notes about this kind of stuff for years. since i was just a kid.
i've always thought i had an old soul. almost as if i can access a previous life somehow. (not that i believe that) but it feels that i can predict things rather well. like walking down a road i've traveled before.